Non-Judgmental Dwight

Beware we may be judged by non-judgmental Dwight
We must not judge what others do as wrong or right
If we dare we will be judged as quite impolite
So nothing's wrong and ev'rything is now alright
Except of course to judge because that's judged not right

Now we don't mean that ev'rything has the green light
We judge that scams and war and rape are just not right
And child abuse and murder they give us a fright
It's a specific list of things we must get right
Things that Dwight says we may not judge as wrong or right

Beware we may be judged by non-judgmental Dwight
So if we disagree we'll shut our mouths real tight
He judges those who judge what could be wrong or right
There is no wrong! Don't disagree! Don't be uptight!
Because we may be judged by non-judgmental Dwight

Southwest Cumulonimbus Juice

The juice of the southwest cumulonimbus
Is something I think that we ought to discuss
You know the whole world is in such a big fuss
Because for our health it is such a big plus

We collect the small drops in a tiny flask
Our process is secret so don't even ask
It's worth a hundred bucks for such a hard task
A once ancient process took years to unmask

We gather our precious fluid drop by drop
In a guarded back room at our secret stop
Cumulonimbus juice from our southwest shop
Nothing can beat it, this juice is just tip top

Don't listen to lies that this is oil of snake
Rumors that these are just thunder clouds at stake
Giving rain drops filling up our local lake
Southwest cumulonimbus juice is no fake

Well if you must know, the rumor is quite true
The magical brew we collect from the blue
But then that all depends upon your world view
An elixir to some is water to you

Take a Chance on True Romance

To you my love I gave my heart
I prayed that we would never part
We took a chance on true romance
Now I've become just an old fart

If our love were put on a chart
And were measured right from the start
We took a chance with no finance
And now our love's a work of art

And as our beauty falls apart
Our love's more beautiful at heart
As years advance our love does dance
I thank the Lord for Cupid's dart

So if a man were really smart
He'd go check out the marriage mart
And take a chance on true romance
And never from that state depart